Good night!

Hi everyone. I still deal with lots of emotions on a daily basis. It is sometimes hard to really understand what troubles you, and sometimes you don't realize it when you begin to take it out on other people. I was having a haircut the other day with a woman who's son returned from Irag (sniper for 5 years). He found out he was going back for another 15 months because he is very good at what he does. What his Mom and Dad couldn't understand, however, is why he didn't want to talk to them about things that troubled him over there, but rather, a stranger therapist.

The funny thing was, as soon as she told me, I knew. As soon as it came out of her mouth, it was clear as day. I went through the same thing with my wife and family. Talking about things that bother us deep down, and I mean deep down, can put your loved ones in a position of seeing you hurt and vulnerable. In order to prevent ourselves from hurting our loved ones, we do what we THINK is the right thing and hide the pain so you won't worry. In my case, my wife went through the exact thing with me as she was by my side the whole time, and I am sure she has things to work on. But after our first "conversation" about my mom - and I mean the details and images that bother me still today - we cried for hours and hours together. It hurt me. I don't want to put her in that pain. She cried for my mom, but she cried for seeing me so hurt.

Let's talk. Let's give it a shot...I'm listening.

Chris

Good night and see you all in the morning.

Welcome to my new blog everyone. I have never done this before, but hope to find it a lot of fun. I recently lost my mother at age 62 to Esophageal Cancer on March 31st, 2008. She was diagnosed on December 3rd, and I left my job to return home and care for her and my father. After everything I witnessed, and everything I was a part to (her care), I can't stop thinking about all the people suffering who are alone, or who do not have anyone to talk to about what they are going through.

Therefore, I invite anyone who wants to discuss or talk about cancer issues to speak with me, as I would love to share information that may help others.

I'll check back as today, July 13th is the first official blog for my mom.

Chris